Carl and Laura Lentz Say Daughter Was Left in Tears After Overhearing Backstage Criticism

Carl and Laura Lentz are opening up about the personal cost of revisiting their marriage publicly, saying their daughter Ava overheard disparaging comments about her father while watching her parents participate in a television interview.

In their Lights On episode, "Are You Getting Better or Getting Bitter?", the couple described the incident during a wider conversation about criticism, accountability and their new book, Overcoming Infidelity: 10 Conversations to Help Heal the Hurt.

According to Carl, Ava was backstage watching a monitor when another guest and that guest's publicist began commenting negatively on his appearance and emotional responses. He described the guest as a therapist who works with people affected by betrayal.

Carl said the remarks included mockery of his tattoos and suggestions that his tears were predictable or performative. The couple did not name the woman, and their account does not include her response.

When Carl and Laura finished their appearance, they said Ava became visibly upset and burst into tears. But Carl recalled that she then gathered herself and reassured them that, although the experience had shaken her, she felt able to handle it.

For her parents, the moment tested the very message they have been sharing: rebuilding a life involves learning how to face painful opinions without allowing those opinions to determine every response.

Laura acknowledged feeling fiercely protective. Carl said he also felt an immediate urge to confront the person involved, but praised Ava's composure.

The episode's discussion extended beyond that backstage encounter to the scrutiny surrounding the couple's decision to remain married and publish a book about infidelity.

Laura said she had needed distance from some friends who could not support her decision to stay with Carl in ways she found helpful. She described those separations as another form of loss, while emphasising the importance of resisting resentment toward people who stepped away.

Her determination to avoid bitterness, she explained, began with an early conversation with her therapist. She did not want betrayal to leave her permanently hardened.

That decision did not eliminate grief. Laura recalled spending days and weeks in bed struggling with sadness, and spoke about the work involved in processing her emotions through therapy, honest conversation, prayer and journaling.

Her account presented healing as an ongoing practice rather than an absence of pain. She acknowledged that criticism still sometimes prompts her to begin writing a response online before reconsidering whether engaging would accomplish anything.

Carl, meanwhile, acknowledged his own responsibility for the scepticism that continues to surround him.

"I gave reasons for people to question my integrity," he said.

Discussing accusations that his public activity represents an attempted comeback, Carl said he understands why people scrutinise his motives. He maintained that he is seeking to build a different life, while recognising that his past conduct has given others grounds to question him.

The couple also said they knew publishing their book would invite strong reactions. Carl recalled periods when they felt unprepared to handle those opinions constructively and questioned whether they should proceed.

Throughout the conversation, they encouraged listeners to consider who is offering criticism, why it hurts, what responsibility they bear and whether there is something useful to learn.

Their emphasis was on retaining the ability to receive feedback while setting boundaries around voices that consume their attention.

For Laura, that means allowing herself to acknowledge hurt without making it her permanent emotional home. For Carl, it includes accepting that questions about his integrity may continue for a long time.

The backstage incident brought those ideas into the life of their daughter, illustrating how public conversations about a couple's marriage can also affect the family members listening nearby.