For decades, Jimmy Evans has been one of the loudest voices championing biblical marriage. Now, the veteran pastor and marriage expert says the Church is dangerously falling behind as modern relationships buckle under the weight of pornography, smartphones, social media and a growing fear of commitment.
In a candid new interview, Evans warned that while most people still dream of getting married, many are simply too afraid to take the leap because they've watched too many relationships collapse around them. Even more troubling, he believes many churches are failing to provide the guidance couples desperately need before their marriages reach a breaking point.
"The Church just simply isn't interested in marriage," Evans said, pointing to statistics showing that the overwhelming majority of churches dedicate little or no budget to marriage ministry. According to Evans, many pastors avoid teaching on marriage altogether, leaving couples to navigate one of life's biggest commitments with little biblical preparation.
The warning comes as Evans officially passes leadership of XO Marriage to longtime friend and pastor Jimmy Witcher after more than 30 years at the helm. While the leadership transition marks the end of one chapter, both men say the ministry's mission has never been more urgent.
Witcher believes today's marriages are facing pressures previous generations never imagined. Everywhere he looks, couples are physically together but emotionally disconnected, glued to their phones instead of engaging with one another.
He also identified the widespread availability of pornography as one of the greatest threats to healthy relationships, alongside rapidly changing cultural attitudes toward marriage itself.
Those concerns are reflected in national trends. Marriage rates continue to decline across the United States, with fewer adults marrying than at any point in modern history. Yet Evans insists the desire for lifelong commitment hasn't disappeared.
Instead, he argues people have become frightened after witnessing failed marriages among parents, friends and even church leaders.
One of the biggest misconceptions, Evans says, is the popular belief that everyone has a perfect soulmate waiting somewhere. In his view, successful marriages aren't discovered-they're built.
Rather than seeing marriage deteriorate after the honeymoon phase, Evans insists couples who consistently invest in their relationship often experience deeper intimacy and greater joy as the years pass.
Perhaps the most sobering revelation came from Witcher's own experience in ministry. He revealed that he frequently encounters pastors struggling privately in their own marriages, making it difficult for them to preach confidently about relationships from the pulpit.
After speaking at one church, Witcher recalled asking the pastor about his plans for the rest of the day. The response stunned him.
"I'm going home and work on my marriage," the pastor admitted.
For Evans, stories like that reinforce why churches need to intervene much earlier. He said he became troubled years ago by seeing churches advertise divorce recovery ministries while investing comparatively little in helping couples before their marriages unraveled.
Instead of waiting for crisis, XO Marriage now focuses heavily on premarital preparation, mentoring, small groups and practical discipleship designed to strengthen marriages long before divorce becomes a possibility.
The ministry is also removing financial barriers by making many of its digital marriage resources available free of charge, hoping churches of every size can better equip couples.
For Witcher, the mission is deeply personal. More than three decades ago, he and his wife found themselves on the verge of divorce before experiencing what he describes as a miraculous restoration. Looking back, he says they simply didn't understand that healthy marriages require constant attention and intentional effort.
Today, that lesson shapes everything the ministry hopes to accomplish.
Each year, anonymous prayer requests at Witcher's church reveal the same heartbreaking pattern: countless families asking for prayer over struggling marriages, broken homes or the longing to find a godly spouse.
To Evans and Witcher, those requests tell the story of a generation still longing for lasting love-but desperately needing churches willing to help them build it.
